Maybe this is why when we ask people about love, the first thing they tell you is their heartbreak experience. And when you talk about belonging, people share their most excruciating experience of being left out. And when you ask about connections, they tell you stories about disconnections.
When God created Adam and Eve, the ‘imageness’ of God, was the ability to connect and relate with Him, with each other and with the surrounding world. This is the reason why we have such a fierce desire to be connected! That’s the ‘imageness’ of God in us. Connections are the reason why we are here. Connections gives us purpose and meaning in our lives. We are wired for connections. God wants us to be connected with Him and with others, for He is the true source of joy and happiness. And he desires that we live in joy and happiness [1 Thess. 5:16].
But when sin entered the world, along with disobedience, came shame! Shame can be defined as fear of disconnection - is there something in me, that when revealed, will cause others to distance themselves from me?
It’s universal, we all have it! The only people who don’t experience shame are people who are dead or have lost the capacity to feel human empathy. We all have it but no one wants to talk about it. And the less you talk about it, the reality is that you have more of it! The undergirding thought behind ‘shame’ is ‘I’m not good enough,” “I am not smart enough," "I am not beautiful enough," etc
What is the solution to this? How can we embrace our imperfection so that we can connect as God desires for us to connect?
The Bible reveals that the solution is found in vulnerability. When God asked Adam ‘where are you,’ it was not an issue of God not knowing Adam’s position factually. He wanted Adam to come out and be vulnerable. He wanted Adam to move from shame to vulnerability so that in authenticity, he can once again restore the ‘imageness’ of God!
The problem is that we hate vulnerability. Vulnerability says I am not perfect! Vulnerability says, “I have to deal with the shame and junk that are deeply rooted in my life. How can someone love me with all this junk in me?" As a result, we shrink and hide instead of being authentic and open in our relationships. The word "courage" comes from Latin word COR, which means heart. The original definition of courage was "to tell the story of who you are with your whole heart." Friends, we must have the courage to tell the story of who we are with our whole hearts. Connections take place as a result of authenticity. You must be willing to let go of who you think you should be in order to be who you are, a necessity for genuine connections!
So let’s stop pretending we are perfect, we are not. We live in a society where people take fat from their butts and inject it in their faces in order to look perfect. We are not perfect. Instead of pretending, let us embrace our imperfection. As I end, let me share with you something I learned in art school.
Have you heard of ‘wabi sabi’? It’s a Japanese philosophy that celebrates beauty in what’s natural - flaws and all. If you’ve been to a Japanese restaurant and sipped hot green tea out of a lopsided, cracked, asymmetrical tea cup, you know wabi sabi. The tea cups are handmade and irregularly shaped, with uneven an glaze, cracks and, yet, are absolutely beautiful in their deliberate imperfection! Learn to prize the drips and cracks in your messy lives!
As we launch, may Disciple Church embrace the imperfections we see in each other. Instead of judging and criticizing, let us love and trust one another, as Jesus has done for us. This is why our growth groups are so important! Let us come together, be vulnerable with one another, love one another and connect with one another! Love the cracks and drips, until Jesus “who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus!”
Amen, brotha!
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